Saturday Night's Dream

 Oh, the vivid dreamer and prolific author I am!

And oh, the privilege to write down my dreams!

Here's the one I had the night before last.

[Begin dream]

I finally had the courage to ask Relative, "Why have you not read my books?"

She said, "I don't like them anymore."

I tried not to cry, yell, or wring my hands. "I can't believe you're saying this. I was hoping you'd support me. I worked so hard on all of them. I've spent so much time on and invested my emotions into every word."

My husband was beside me and said to Relative, "I'd like you to consider reading her books and telling her what you liked about them."

Relative said to my husband, "History is more interesting, more significant."

[End dream]

It's Monday morning, and I'm still trying to get over this one.

A Journal Entry of a Seasoned Author/Rookie Screenwriter

Saturday, 5/23/2026

A wonderful afternoon I'm having. Nothing going on. Nothing I need to do at the moment. Writing sure is in me. It's still in me even though I'm not writing anything big. It's just past 7:00. Something about this down time, while I'm alone and scribbling away, that makes me think of Cultivate [a local coffee and flower shop]. I believe the last time I went there was earlier this year. To work on my screenplay. That had to be what I worked on. Cultivate, where I went to work on 3 books in a short period of time. Thought about all this as I read the latter part of [Ela Thier's] memoir . I love how she wrote about writers needing community and support. Going to a coffee shop, writing together, brainstorming. Well, I did the writing part. All those times I went to Cultivate, I went alone. Oh, that thinker I am sure was there, present, focused. One of few who was alone. Laptop, flash drive, notebook, and don't forget headphones. So I can listen to that Strong & Steadfast playlist for the millionth time. You can't undo the pain, the anger and the shame ["Blinded" by Mark Mulch]. I want you to scream my name ["Scream" by W.A.S.P.]. Won't be the one to hold you when you cry in the middle of the night ["The Devil That You Know" by Tattered Sons]. I'm rusted and weathered, barely holding together ["Weathered" by Creed]. The playlist is about an hour long. It got to be that way especially when I added on Your Love is a Rumor [by Tattered Sons]. That was my cue to get up, get some more water, go to the bathroom. Two hours of that. Get there at 8, get set up as efficiently as possible. The sooner, the better. In that way, the music of choice playing in the shop doesn't un-inspire me. That first song to remind me of why I wrote Strong & Steadfast . This sounds strange, but "Every Rose Has its Thorn" [by Poison]. That joke about being in so much pain. That joke about Bret supporting endo because of his tension on the word pain.

Then those words a few songs later in Home Again. Hard to believe I once had that song on repeat. Not only when I was diagnosed with endo, but also when I wrote the novel.

Brainstorming

Brainstorming, what I've been doing a lot of lately. Writing things down in any of my notebooks. 

I take notes on just about everything I hear. 

In learning about the film industry, this is something I learned about producers:

* Get production crew 4 months out

* Set shoot date to keep from stalling

* For a feature film (which Strong & Steadfast just may be if this comes to fruition), shoot date should be one year out

Here's what I learned about directing movies:

* Make performances believable

* Actors should be doing something while talking

* They need to speak over each other

On any given morning, I'd write in my journal then work on a novel, a devotion, or more recently the screenplay. I may want to consider making an "irrelevant scene". Well, of course, nothing I've written is that. Let me put this in a better way. Perhaps make some short scripts of one of the scenes from one of my previous novels. Which one will I choose? Active Waiting , Twofold Love Comeback , The Unknown Missing Piece ? If I'm still long enough, I'll think of some awesome idea.

As I learned these basics of directing and producing, I wasn't above these reminders of storytelling:

* Plot: the pursuit of a goal despite obstacles (goal, motivation, conflict--my fellow authors will be familiar with that)

* A character is defined by the theme of the plot

* A meaningful ending is one in which the character steps out of his or her pattern

I take copious notes at church. What I need to remember is look at them soon afterward. One of the pastors at our church taught from John 2:1-11, message title Yes Changes Everything. When you say yes to Jesus, we open the door to spiritual transformation, a life of great adventure. Therefore, don't say, "Yeah, but" or let fear of rejection or failure paralyze you. Furthermore--and I need to remind myself of this daily--maybe many times a day--don't recite the history of failures and rejections.

How to apply all this: simply trust God for guidance, for the right place and time to do everything, to connect with the right people.

There are many plans in a man’s heart, Nevertheless the Lord’s counsel—that will stand. (Proverbs 19:21, NKJV)

Thoughts on a Rainy Saturday Morning

What I thought last night as I got ready for bed: I'm getting up early tomorrow to tweak Kill the Locust, no interruptions.

What I thought when I woke up this morning: Do I have to get up? Today would be a good day to lie in bed. After all, I've worked hard (mostly on other than writing) this week. At that time, it was a little after 5:30 AM. Two and a half hours till Cultivate opens. I ate, washed my hair, wrote four pages in my journal, and packed my bag--in spite of feeling worn out. 

Why was I so tired?

Usually, for the first few hours of early mornings, I'm mostly oblivious to everything else. Therefore, when I walked out to my car, I noticed it had rained. Oh! No wonder I'd poured my heart out in four pages, front and back, of my journal--and felt like going back to bed.

Do I give in to my tiredness or take full advantage of this rainy Saturday morning? 

THE LATTER. 

Soon after I made my beeline to my usual spot at Cultivate and started unpacking, I realized I'd forgotten my smartphone. Not wanting to be without it--who can't and won't in this day and age?--I drove home and got it.

Surprisingly, I wasn't too upset. I knew I'd still have time to write. Plus, it allowed me to think about writing this as my blog post for the month.

The two biggest takeaways for this early rainy Saturday morning (before 10:00):

(1) If you don't sweat the small stuff, something good will come out of it. Be open to it.

(2) Write anyway, even when you're feeling tired and are sacrificing rest. We talked about this before last month's Word Weavers Page 48 meeting, about writing at odd hours, especially at 2 or 3 AM. I thought about this a lot over the past few weeks. Thanks for the healthy, encouraging conversation, J. D. Wininger .

I'm now settled here and in a writing groove. With this wet morning and the brief interruption, let me see how much better I can give Amy, my main character, hope and strength in all her physical and emotional pain.